Sometimes, it's not that easy

You have a newborn.  After all the congratulations and celebrating is gone, you realize a couple things.  Firstly, you're exhausted.  Get used to it, this is a permanent feature of your life and you'll never feel well rested again (or at least for the next 20 years or so).  Secondly, now that the in-laws and family are gone, and you're having your first "alone time" with the baby, those kids are stressful.  Between the two of those, you have yourself a recipe for a meltdown, but there are a few things you can do to keep on top of your life.

First of all, always remember, the baby is on your side.  He doesn't want to be crying for three hours either, and if you can figure out what he wants, he won't.  Fortunately for you, in the first few months or so, the things he cries about will be generally (albeit not exclusively) one of three things; he needs a new diaper; he needs food; he wants to be held, typically in that order.  The first two are pretty self explanatory: give it to him.  The third sometimes represents a challenge for us dads especially since we lack the intuition for how to hold a baby.  First remember, if you're not comfortable, he probably isn't either.  Babies are conveniently sized and shaped to be comfortably held (thanks nature) and you should be able to find a good position for both of you.  Secondly, (but perhaps more importantly) remember that until he has good head control of his own, you have to make sure his head and neck are well supported.  Third, you don't have to hold him in the crook of your arm, and in fact, sometimes they don't want to be held that way.  If you're holding him horizontally and he's still upset, try holding him up and down.  Hold his rear with one and and his head and neck with the other, up against your chest.  Sometimes the sound of your heartbeat is just what he needs to relax and get some sleep.

Of course, sometimes that baby is just going to cry.  If you can't calm him down, and feel yourself getting frustrated, it's probably time you just set him in the crib and take a minute or two for yourself.  Grab a snack, relax for a minute.  There's a small chance he may just cry himself to sleep, or have calmed himself down by the time you get back.  If not, chances are just picking him up will calm him down after he's been crying for a few minutes.  Trust me, it's what mom would do.  The important thing is to avoid getting mad with the baby, that'll just end poorly.

Lastly, if you need to do something for yourself quick, don't feel bad about setting him down, even if it does result in a fit.  You can't be a good caretaker if you're grumpy.

Being a dad is a lot like being a tree...

When I first stepped into fatherhood, I didn't know what to do with myself.  It wasn't like a panicked, "OHMEHGERSHIMADAD!" it was more of a "Oh, you're here.  What do you want to do now?" feeling.  You see, the problem is you spend 9 months thinking about how much fun you're going to have teaching your baby to do things and play games with you, but when he finally arrives, you realize he's just a noisy, squirmy, often dirty, but adorably tiny person.  Sound like fun?  It's ok if it doesn't, that feeling goes away pretty quick.

Once you get past that, you'll realize there are a lot of fulfilling activities you can do with a newborn.  Here's a list of some of Oliver's favorites:

• Sit outside and describe everything you see. Remember to make sure it's shady, nothing is worse than a sun-burnt newborn, except his mother.
• Read a book.  It doesn't have to be a children's book, you can read whatever you're interested in, they're still just getting used to your voice and developing a sense of language.
• Take pictures.  Lots of them.  It's fun and mom will love it.
• Just hold him.  Stare at him for awhile.  It's more rewarding than it sounds, you just can't enough of your own baby.

In a few months time, there'll be plenty of time to laugh and play games.  Just enjoy the relative tranquility of a newborn while it lasts.  Being a first-time dad is a big challenge, and it can be pretty confusing.  Awkward moments will be abundant, you'll make mistakes, but it's ok, you know you're parents did too.  Just remember, being a dad is a lot like being a tree, in that it has nothing to do with being an elephant.