True: Babies get sick
False: You will panic
True: Your wife will panic
False: Your life will be horrible while he's sick
True: Your life will be horrible while you're sick
Oliver came down with his first illness last week, nothing too bad, just a head cold. The first day he had a fever, it started at about 100 and went up to 102 shortly after I left for work, which resulted in a long string of texts from the wife. She called the pediatrician and he told her to keep an eye on him and make sure he was still eating, and that it would probably pass over without any trouble.
The next day the fever was gone, but he was still miserable. He had a bad cough and (I'm assuming) a sore throat. He was cranky, and didn't eat a lot, and started sleeping more than normal. By the next day (which coincidently was the first day I had time alone with him) he was hardly eating and just wanted to sleep all day. Which made me feel really bad for him. On the other hand...
It gave me all sorts of time to do things I wanted to. It was almost a day to myself, he was only up for about 2 hours total before I left for work, so I logged a good amount of me time. I felt bad as I got him ready for daycare, he wasn't fevering anymore, so even though I knew he was no longer contagious, I still didn't want to get anyone else sick. That feeling ended the moment I opened the door to his room and heard his cough...only it wasn't him. Then again, still not him. Turns out every baby in that room had the same cough he did, must have been a rough day for the caregivers.
Of course the next day, I awoke to a sore throat of my own. Fortunately, he was still sleepy, so I didn't have to do a lot for him, but it took a lot of the fun out of my alone time. It only got worse from there, and unlike him, I didn't get to sleep through it all.
And here I am, a week later, and I'm still stuffy and loosing my voice by the end of the day. Fortunately, Oliver's back to normal now. It was nice having that extra time to myself, but I sure did miss all his giggles.
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Showing posts with label stress. Show all posts
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Thursday, October 25, 2012
Gravity and your baby
You're lying in bed next to your baby and drift off accidentally. Next thing you know, THUD. Springing into action you're feet are on the floor before he's even crying(which at this point you're just glad to hear), you're at his side within seconds. Thanks to that wonderful first aid class you took, you know to check his head and neck before you move him, but not suspecting any damage, he's in your arms in moments. A few seconds later, and the crying is subsiding, and by the time mom has rushed out of the shower to see what happened, he's smiling at her. I think it's important I note here, that if you suspect a serious injury, or any head trauma, or just need some peace of mind, please call your pediatrician, better safe than sorry.
You however, now feel like the worst parent in the world. You just allowed a totally preventable and highly dangerous accident to happen to your baby. For what is probably the first time, you've experienced that moment of panic, remorse, and ultimately the painful experience of having let down your son.
What you need to remember though, is that this happens to most new parents at some point. As you're transitioning from a baby that can't go anywhere you haven't put it, to one that can move himself, you're bound to miss something. It's ok. Secondly, this definitely isn't the last time he'll get hurt. In a couple months he'll be walking and then it's skinned knees and bruises on a regular basis. These guys are built tougher than they look, and that terrible feeling you have will well outlast any pain they feel.
In the words of the great physicist Dr. Sheldon Cooper, "Gravity, thou art a heartless bitch."
You however, now feel like the worst parent in the world. You just allowed a totally preventable and highly dangerous accident to happen to your baby. For what is probably the first time, you've experienced that moment of panic, remorse, and ultimately the painful experience of having let down your son.
What you need to remember though, is that this happens to most new parents at some point. As you're transitioning from a baby that can't go anywhere you haven't put it, to one that can move himself, you're bound to miss something. It's ok. Secondly, this definitely isn't the last time he'll get hurt. In a couple months he'll be walking and then it's skinned knees and bruises on a regular basis. These guys are built tougher than they look, and that terrible feeling you have will well outlast any pain they feel.
In the words of the great physicist Dr. Sheldon Cooper, "Gravity, thou art a heartless bitch."
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Sometimes, it's not that easy
You have a newborn. After all the congratulations and celebrating is gone, you realize a couple things. Firstly, you're exhausted. Get used to it, this is a permanent feature of your life and you'll never feel well rested again (or at least for the next 20 years or so). Secondly, now that the in-laws and family are gone, and you're having your first "alone time" with the baby, those kids are stressful. Between the two of those, you have yourself a recipe for a meltdown, but there are a few things you can do to keep on top of your life.
First of all, always remember, the baby is on your side. He doesn't want to be crying for three hours either, and if you can figure out what he wants, he won't. Fortunately for you, in the first few months or so, the things he cries about will be generally (albeit not exclusively) one of three things; he needs a new diaper; he needs food; he wants to be held, typically in that order. The first two are pretty self explanatory: give it to him. The third sometimes represents a challenge for us dads especially since we lack the intuition for how to hold a baby. First remember, if you're not comfortable, he probably isn't either. Babies are conveniently sized and shaped to be comfortably held (thanks nature) and you should be able to find a good position for both of you. Secondly, (but perhaps more importantly) remember that until he has good head control of his own, you have to make sure his head and neck are well supported. Third, you don't have to hold him in the crook of your arm, and in fact, sometimes they don't want to be held that way. If you're holding him horizontally and he's still upset, try holding him up and down. Hold his rear with one and and his head and neck with the other, up against your chest. Sometimes the sound of your heartbeat is just what he needs to relax and get some sleep.
Of course, sometimes that baby is just going to cry. If you can't calm him down, and feel yourself getting frustrated, it's probably time you just set him in the crib and take a minute or two for yourself. Grab a snack, relax for a minute. There's a small chance he may just cry himself to sleep, or have calmed himself down by the time you get back. If not, chances are just picking him up will calm him down after he's been crying for a few minutes. Trust me, it's what mom would do. The important thing is to avoid getting mad with the baby, that'll just end poorly.
Lastly, if you need to do something for yourself quick, don't feel bad about setting him down, even if it does result in a fit. You can't be a good caretaker if you're grumpy.
First of all, always remember, the baby is on your side. He doesn't want to be crying for three hours either, and if you can figure out what he wants, he won't. Fortunately for you, in the first few months or so, the things he cries about will be generally (albeit not exclusively) one of three things; he needs a new diaper; he needs food; he wants to be held, typically in that order. The first two are pretty self explanatory: give it to him. The third sometimes represents a challenge for us dads especially since we lack the intuition for how to hold a baby. First remember, if you're not comfortable, he probably isn't either. Babies are conveniently sized and shaped to be comfortably held (thanks nature) and you should be able to find a good position for both of you. Secondly, (but perhaps more importantly) remember that until he has good head control of his own, you have to make sure his head and neck are well supported. Third, you don't have to hold him in the crook of your arm, and in fact, sometimes they don't want to be held that way. If you're holding him horizontally and he's still upset, try holding him up and down. Hold his rear with one and and his head and neck with the other, up against your chest. Sometimes the sound of your heartbeat is just what he needs to relax and get some sleep.
Of course, sometimes that baby is just going to cry. If you can't calm him down, and feel yourself getting frustrated, it's probably time you just set him in the crib and take a minute or two for yourself. Grab a snack, relax for a minute. There's a small chance he may just cry himself to sleep, or have calmed himself down by the time you get back. If not, chances are just picking him up will calm him down after he's been crying for a few minutes. Trust me, it's what mom would do. The important thing is to avoid getting mad with the baby, that'll just end poorly.
Lastly, if you need to do something for yourself quick, don't feel bad about setting him down, even if it does result in a fit. You can't be a good caretaker if you're grumpy.
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